The phrase “hurry up and wait” is all too common for us in the world of fertility. The waiting game starts when trying to find the right person to share your life with. Then there’s the waiting for the right time. Maybe the waiting starts at the first appointment or for test results. My favorite waiting game are those 3 minutes for a Dollar store pregnancy test to determine the next phase of my life. Or maybe you’re like me and your “hurry up and wait” has managed to last 6.5 years. Now you’re literally sitting on a waiting list to be matched with someone who will gift you with the opportunity to try again. And even after you match you still have to play the game again. Wait to be cleared, wait for appointments, wait for the call, wait, wait, wait. It can be maddening. So how do we play the game? There’s no right or wrong way to play, but you have to play or you will go crazy. Personally, I am a very impatient person, and this waiting game can play with someone else for all I care. But we all know that the prize at the end of the game is worth it, so okay I will play. But I’m not happy about it.
Whether you just started playing The Baby Waiting Game, or you have been at it for a while, just know you’re not the only player. But maybe we can help each other get thru this (you know like make some kind of cheat codes or form an alliance! Haha).
Here are some of my “cheat codes” when playing The Baby Waiting Game. Good luck!
Take this opportunity to bring in some money to assist with the costs. There’s tons of ideas for fundraising. We did a Puzzle fundraiser, a T-Shirt fundraiser, we even teamed up with a local business who did s fundraiser night and donated a % of the proceeds to our cause. There’s a lot of ideas out there!
Get your house ready for that baby. Do house projects that maybe you would have put off if the baby was here. Maybe you want to move to a bigger/smaller house.
I changed job industries. I left my job that I was at for 10 years and dived into another industry. I took a pay-cut, but I was able to try something new without worrying about it effecting my family and our finances. Maybe now is the time to go for that job you always wanted or hey maybe its time to go back to school! OR maybe it’s time to start that new business you have been thinking of. If you try it now go for it!
When the baby gets here going on vacations will be different. So take this time to go to the places you have always wanted.
Do all the things that you want to do for you. When your baby gets here, you will be so in love, and focused on your new family unit. So take advantage of this time to do all the things you want to do for yourself. Try new things, or maybe bring back old-things into your life. Just focus on you right now, because you’re going to need those reminders of who you are outside of parenthood some day. So build up those reminders now while you have the time.
It doesn’t matter what you decide to do with your time. Just remember you only get one life to live, so live it the way you want. Don’t let The Baby Waiting Game take up so much room in your life that you forget to actually live! These are just suggestions from my own personal experience. If you could add more to this list, do it! I would love to hear other ideas on how you beat The Baby Waiting Game.
For many couples, the only way to build their family is through assisted reproductive technologies (ART) including in vitro fertilization (IVF). With IVF, eggs are retrieved from a woman’s body and fertilized with sperm in the laboratory, creating embryos that are grown for several days outside the body. At that point, many embryos are cryopreserved prior to transfer to a woman’s uterus. What becomes of such embryos if they remain in storage at the time of progenitors’ divorce?
